After watching “eXistenZ” and after the class discussion of it, I really had to take a step back and think about why I play video games, and was I making the best use of my time. I want to play music professionally, but so often, when I have the time to practice, or write songs, I end up watching TV, or playing video games. My life is pretty full, so when I have free time, the easiest thing is to just escape into a video game; while this can be a fun diversion, it isn’t satisfying in the long-term, it only provides brief pleasure. Whereas, the satisfaction that comes from getting paid to play the music I love, is much deeper and (dare I say it) life-affirming. I’m doing what I love - creating art, with the skills I have, and that’s something that can’t ever happen with the Xbox, no matter how many hours or days one spends playing at it.
So, I’ve decided to give up Xbox indefinitely. On Wednesday, I gave it to J to watch after, while I try to do more productive things with my time. My wife reminded me that it was Ash Wednesday, and maybe I could just give it up for Lent, but since the idea of Lent has absolutely no significance to me, I decided against that. My plan is to go for 3 months without the Xbox, while trying to focus my time on my music and education. If I can make it ok for 3 months, then I’ll probably just sell it or let J keep it.