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Friday, April 01, 2005

Every day is reserved for idiotic behavior

So, in honor of April Fool's Day, my coworker had a client call up our manager and say that his equipment wasn't working right, then the client hung up, and then my coworker went to our manager after the phone call and said "APRIL FOOLS!! HA HA!!!". Before he did this plan, he told me about it, like it was the most ingenious prank ever, like some kind of Double Indemnity triple cross action was about to go down. It went down, my manager acted amused, and then my coworker came and asked me if I had any friends that I wanted to pull some hilarious phone pranks on. I told him I'm just not that "into" April Fool's Day. I didn't have the heart to tell him I think he's a moron and an embarrassment to the company and that today's "prank" would be funnier if he didn't naturally screw up so many things on an everyday basis.

Anyway, for my April Fool's Day gag, I told my mom I was going to get her a dog, but the jokes on her, cause I mailed her a cat instead! It should be fine, though; I packed it with about 5 days worth of cat food and kitty litter in the box with it. I think she'll be pleasantly surprised.

6 comments:

Flyingwaitress said...

Today's April Fools Day? How could I miss it, anyone could have gotten me today and I wouldn't have suspected a thing. So the joke's on you! Now I know, and I'm planning away...

Brent said...

WTF!?! I am totally getting your smug ass fired, bitch!

the don said...

no. you're fired!

Jay said...

Well, there's always a guy to play the Fool part pretty good.

jonny ragel said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
jonny ragel said...

thanks for commenting on my interview post. as promised I have arranged five questions for you. do as you wish with them:

Q1: you are tanning on a beach in milan when larry mullen jr sits down next to you. contact is cordial- brief eye contact recognizing you are there. after getting settled in he starts to apply sunscreen to his face and shoulders. as he gets to his back you notice there is a substantial area he cannot reach with the sunscreen. you are the only one around who seems to notice. what do you do?

Q2: you are alone in an elevator in new york city at a nice hotel. nevermind why you are in a nice hotel in new york. perhaps you are a professional male escort---I don't know---shut up and let me ask the question already. ok. so you're in the elevatar going from the 32nd floor to street level. the elevator stops at the 30th floor. the doors open and in walks the edge. 'hey. how's it going?' he sais, in a cordial greeting. you now have 30 floors untill you get to street level. what do you do?

Q3: you just bought season tickets for the trail blazers. upon finding your seats you notice they are right next to gus van zant's seats. halfway through the second quarter you observe gus spilling mustard on his chin while eating a sausage dog. he doesn't know though and seems perfectly content spending the rest of his life with a yellow sploch of mustard on his grill. you feel a little embarrassed for him. what do you do next?

Q4: you are approached by an angel and given this offer: total fame as a drummer in a critically acclaimed platinum selling band for 15 years! you will see all of europe and meet important people whilst making some serious dough. the only catch with the deal is that after the 15 years is up you can't play music ever again. do you accept?

Q5: you are hosting a luncheon at wildwood in northwest portland. you can have any 6 guests you want in the entire world! of course, they must be currently alive. 3 men. 3 women. who do you invite and why?