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Friday, April 22, 2005

I'm Batman

Well, if anyone doubts that I spent most of Tuesday (aka the day of my last three posts) in a twilight world of half-asleepiness, just ask my pasta. I heated up some of Moz's leftovers for lunch, and prepared to have a big glass of root beer with it, but instead of pouring into the pint glass, I poured it right into my hot pasta! Yoinks! So that might explain some of the randomness and mendacity of the last few postings.

Anyway, on a more personal note, I saw my mother at the cafe I played at last night, and she was all pissy and more auntly than motherly, so I was like "Hey mom. Why are you here?" And then, I swear the floodgates of heaven opened, but it was just my mom crying.

She was all "Why don't you return my emails?!? I was concerned about you and your cousin and your wife, but you never write me back!!".

I said, "Mom! You haven't emailed me in like a year, so you're the one with the problem, not me!"

And she goes, "What??!! I emailed you this morning and it was critically important, but I guess since I'm only your mother, then I don't deserve to be emailed back to..."

And I said, "Mom, I swear! Which email address did you send it to?"

And she goes, "PuRrFeCTTsexXXybEYotCH1977@gmail.com"

I said, "Mom! I haven't used that email address in at least 3 or 4 months."

5 comments:

jonny ragel said...

nice show. we were worried you weren't going to do any drum solos. then you did, like, twenty-seven. bravo it was.

root beer sucks on pasta. but it is good as the final ingredient in a graveyard soda. the other ingredients are mostly pepsi for me, with a dash of 7up and dr.pepper. why am I telling you this? as one of my best friends I was hoping you woud tell me.

other things that aren't good on pasta:
1- the end of your tie.
2- boogers.
3- kraft cheese.
4- depressing conversation.
5- direct sunlight.
6- star wars figures- unless anakin is melting in spaghetti sauce, of course.

Sloop said...

As one of my best friends, I have no qualms telling you here, in private, that most things in my kitchen are terrible in pasta:
1. soy milk
2. peanut butter
3. Star Wars Cheezits
4. sugar
5. mayo
6. neufchatel cheese
7. 1/2 of an avocado
8. mustard
9. pickles
10. teriyaki sauce
11. Black Butte Porter

A fridge full of condiments and no food, how embarrassing

BonikaStJames said...

Since I'm eves dropping on a conversation between two best friends who are also two of my best friends I would like to add that some of the things listed below are actually great in pasta:
1. Neufchatel cheese is a base for alfredo sauce.
2. black butte porter as an ingredient in your basic marinara spices it up nicely.
3. direct sunlight will release the flavors of herbs.
4. sugar is also a basic indigent in spaghetti sauce.

However, I will agree with the rest and add:
1. road kill
2. audits
3. bugs
4. mold

jonny ragel said...

do you guys think you could have spelled 'neufchatel' without looking at the label? if so I'm pretty darn impressed.

Jay said...

I am going to totally disregard the above comments because I think I saw the word booger, and if that's so, then I am stearing clear! I am sure that root beer is not the worst thing you could put on pasta, and I don't care to find out what else you boys thought up. I myself made chicken limone last night and thought "oh, is this a little too tart?". No boogers involved.