Wednesday, November 29, 2006
Words to live by
Since I've spent the better part of the past 6 days in a room, at a desk, trying to write intelligently about things that I probably have no business writing about (Dog Day Afternoon, Bottle Rocket, truth vs. fiction, reality vs. imagination, etc.) I've been doing a lot of thinking about the way life is. I know that's about as broad a statement as could ever possibly be made, but tough; this is my blog. I'll blog as vague as I want. So, in an effort to maintain my status as a government-funded "edutainment" blog, I'll now impart some of the pearls of wisdom I've stumbled upon or perhaps invented in the past week:
- It's old idea, but true: Shopping has replaced Christ as the new meaning of Christmas. Think about it; people line up for hours outside of Walmart, not for a religious ritual, but to find bargains.
- Mid-80's Bob Dylan isn't very timeless. Empire Burlesque makes this point emphatically.
- Never look a gift horse in the mouth, but always, always look under the hood of a gift car. And then have it thoroughly inspected by a trusted mechanic. Not just the water pump, which might need to be replaced; look at the whole shebang. Otherwise you might find yourself in the middle of rush hour traffic, in the fast lane, and your musty-smelling MPV just craps out, and nothing works, not even the hazard lights. Trust me on this one, folks.
- No matter how many times I confirm something with a person, a third party is able to confuse things, and negate our past positive communications, rendering them null and void.
- I believe a certain class I'm taking is a huge waste of time, and apparently the tone of my essays has reflected this belief. The prof commented on the "arch condescension" of my weekly essays. Ha. What a fool, a buffoon, a simpleton! I could outsmarten him any day of the week. But seriously I had to look up "arch" and "condescension" just to figure out what exactly he was saying.